Growly Gus

Last night I was a horrible "growly gus." I can't remember what upset me. We as women sometimes like to push it off as "hormonal." (However, don't EVEN let a man bring that up!)

All afternoon, I was quick tempered and "short" with everyone. Being creative sometimes helps me to feel better. Therefore, I went down to Bob's office to work on our new family devotion books. I worked so hard to put them together, and distributed them with pride to each family member. There's a place for them to put their memory work, and pockets to keep extra stuff. On each book I carefully, and as artistically as I could, put each members name on the front cover. To my joy everyone was so pleased with their new book. My girls, being my girls, decided it needed further decoration. Anah immediately went off to put paint designs on her name, and came back to excitedly show me what she had done. The perfect mother would have lovingly looked at her hard work and said something that would have encouraged her to continue to be artistic to the Glory of God. After all isn't that what I had just done? When God creates a beautiful sunset, I thank him and praise him for it. When my daughter is creative I say, "Anah I worked so hard on those! What were you thinking? I wanted them to all be the same!" Granted, this is not my normal response to my girls and if I could rewind that moment I would not speak those words. I would look at the excitement on her face and proclaim it genius! But the hurt on Anah's face, makes my own heart hurt. Of course I apologized, but once we "put a hole in the fence," even if we mend it, it cannot be as if it never happened. Enough holes and you might as well build a new fence.
So this morning in my prayer time and devotion I asked the Lord again to forgive me. Praise the Lord I am assured that he did! However, it seems I'm having to ask forgiveness for this too often. I need to do some heart changes. My memory verses for this week are; Ephesians 4:31-32 which says:

³¹ All bitterness, anger and wrath, insult and slander must be removed from you, along with all wickedness. ³² And be kind ^A)">(A) and compassionate ^B)">(B) to one another, forgiving ^C)">(C) one another, just as God also forgave you ^a]">[a] in Christ.

And James 1:19-20:

¹⁹ My dearly loved brothers, understand this: everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, ^A)">(A) ²⁰ for man's anger does not accomplish God's righteousness.

My Self Confrontation book that I use to help me when I have an issue with a particular sin says this:

Anger is a sign of being focused on myself and not trusting God's sovereignty in my life. It is the exact opposite of biblical love and failing to put off anger an bitterness grieves the Holy Spirit, gives Satan an opportunity in my life, obscures my witness to my children and others, and disrupts the unity in the Body of Christ. Dealing with it requires wholehearted obedience to God's Word in every circumstance and with every person.

Lord, I pray that you will hold me accountable for my thoughts and actions this week. May I remember to speak words that edify and build up others. Let me not seek glory for myself but rather reflect your glory to everyone I speak to. Let me not grieve your Holy Spirit, with whom I am sealed for the day of redemption. Let me be a blessing to others. In the precious name of your son Jesus I pray. Amen

This afternoon I am pulling out our craft supplies and letting the girls "Go to town" on their books!

I found what I was missing from my day!

John 5.36-40"I have testimony weightier than that of John. For the very work that the Father has given me to finish, and which I am doing, testifies that the Father has sent me. And the Father who sent me has himself testified concerning me. You have never heard his voice nor seen his form, nor does his word dwell in you, for you do not believe the one he sent. You diligently study the Scriptures because you think that by them you possess eternal life. These are the Scriptures that testify about me, yet you refuse to come to me to have life."

When I had a moment I peeked in at the Living Proof Ministries, with Beth Moore blog site. It was all about reading the scriptures and not really spending time with the Lord. My day was so busy I didn't reaaaaally spend any time with Jesus, even though I spent time in the word and prayer. I was rushed all day.

Off to rectify that! Nighty Night world!

Some days...a rambling account of my day!

Today was just one of those days where I've been running all day. I was up at 6:30 and got the kids up, made sure everyone had breakfast, got dressed, found the inevitable lost shoe, brushed teeth, combed hair, got bags, lunches, double checked homework, out the door, first to the High School, then the 4&5 middle school, then the Charter school, then home for a coffee, bible, prayer break, and I was off again, getting Bob up we read the Bible together then he's out the door, the laundry started, the kitchen cleaned up, the beds made, the clothes hung, start the dryer, another load goes in, wash, dry, fold, put away, wash, dry, fold, put away, it was off to Anah's school to volunteer for a couple of hours, then lunch to get going, for Bob, Pappa, and Me. And on and on my day goes, running here to get the mail, pay a bill, pick up a child take them here, bring them there, answer the phone, can I pick up two more.... to take them there, and pick one other to bring them home???" Somewhere in between, I have a conversation on the phone to encourage my Mom, my sister, and my friend. I typed up a letter for Bob, typed Jeremy's homework, created an alphabet book for Faith, and read a story to charlie, lectured Josh about responsibility. Then it was time for dinner, sometime today I decided to just heat up some leftover chicken soup. While cooking I listened to another story from Pappa's past, for once it's one I haven't heard a dozen times already! lol! Said our blessings, then it was time to eat! On to homework, picked out clothes, gave baths, type this message, then family devotions, story time! Hugs kisses, cuddles, and lights out. But not for me! I still have to clean up the mess in the living room, clean the back bathroom, and I just realized I never got a shower today! *sigh* Don't get too close! With all the running around I've done I probably don't smell too pretty! It's strange though, for all I've done, I somehow don't feel like I've accomplished much??? What's missing? When my brains stops running I'll slow down and figure it out!

A case in point...

If you haven't read my previous post regarding "Faith" you better go do that before reading this.

This afternoon my darling daughter brings to me a one armed rabbit, that I've had for about 15 years now. It is faceless, in that it has no eyes or mouth. But I've always liked it that way. It was one of those craft store bunnies that you can dress up or down and use it for decoration. I don't know how she found it but she said to me, "Mom, I'm going to put a face on this bunny." I replied. "No Faith, that is my bunny and I like her that way." She then replied, "But Mom, she can't see!" I said, "I know Faith, it's okay that she can't. I say no Faith. Okay?" I should have known by her absentminded non-committal answer "Uh-huh." That she was going to do what she wanted anyway. This bunny needed to see.

Faith will see us through..

I got this plaque at the Dollar Store. It's nothing special. Just a black framed saying that says, "Faith will see us through." Those of you who know our Faith, know she can be more than a bit precocious. So we lovingly add to that saying, "Or drive us nuts!"

It's only fair to explain that there is a reason our Faith is so strong willed. I prayed for it. When Bob and I found out we were expecting again we were overjoyed. At the first ultra-sound the doctor looked concerned. When I asked if there was anything wrong, she replied, "I'm counting." "Counting what?" I asked. "It's a little early for fingers and toes!" She said she thought she saw a third baby. Needless to say the room started to swim, or was that just my head? My mind barely wrapped around the idea of one let alone 2 or 3! But there were definitely 2.

Twins!

We were so excited. I rushed home to tell Bob and the other children! What an exciting time. We came up with names, Emma and Elizabeth. (I just knew, as I always did, that they were girls) It wasn't long before things began to go wrong, the morning sickness, which at first was so dramatic, stopped. I began not to feel pregnant at all. Then one morning "the bloody show." I rushed to the doctor's office. An ultrasound confirmed that one of the babies had died. (It was still very early I was only 12 weeks.) The other one had a strong solid heartbeat. What a confusing time, I was happy to still have one, but so grieved the other was gone. "Worry" was my new best friend. We spoke often, we cried together, and consoled each other. God soon broke up this friendship with reminders of His enduring love and patience.

A week after the loss of this twin I received assurances in 3 different ways that God wanted me to have "Faith." A peace that only comes from knowing the heart and mind of God came over me, and I knew that not only was I going to have this little girl, her name was Faith.

(Bear with me here, I'm not going off on rabbit trails! )There is something I do with all my children. I pray over them while they are in my womb for them to take on the character that God wants for them. I use people from the bible as examples. Sometimes their name corresponds to the person. For example with Joshua I prayed that he would be a mighty man of valor for God, a strong warrior for the king of kings. Now he is serving in the military and is still strong in his faith. Jeremiah, is my weeping prophet. The things that break the heart of God really break his heart. He knows he is called to be a preacher for this generation. Anah is my Esther. I prayed that she would be beautiful, wise, obedient, and sensitive to God's direction. Charlie, is our anointed son. His name is actually Jared Charles Haddon, Jared meaning the Lord Descends, we believe the Lord will return for His church in His lifetime, but I also prayed that he would be like King David, a man after God's own heart, and a preacher like Charles Haddon Spurgeon.

During the trial of losing the twin I was reading 1 Samuel 25 in my quiet time. I've added it below if you are not familiar with the story. It said that Abigail was intelligent and beautiful (vs. 3) Her people trusted her and knew she was wise (vs 14) I also noted she was decisive and quick in acting on what she knew was right (vs. 18), she was generous (vs. 19) she knew when to be humble and to accept responsibility(showing good leadership qualities); (vs. 23) she trusted God, and knew His word and His commands,(vs. 26) and was eloquently able to reason and make her opinions known (vs 26-31) however, she knew when to speak her mind, or when to hold her tongue. (vs. 36) She was brave. Just as David was known to be, "A man after God's own heart," It occurred to me that Abigail was "A woman after God's own Heart." (vs. 41)

Anyone of you who knows my Faith, can see that she is beautiful and intelligent, she is quick and decisive, (which often gets her in trouble because she hasn't yet had the years of godly experiences to help her make good decisions)and she is generous, the rest such as humility, responsibility, and knowing when to speak her mind and when to hold her tongue is a work in progress! I just pray that God will give us the wisdom and resourcefulness needed to guide her into the woman we know she will be. After all, none of us are perfect, but we are striving to be like the one who IS!

1 Samuel 25

David, Nabal and Abigail

¹ Now Samuel died, and all Israel assembled and mourned for him; and they buried him at his home in Ramah.
Then David moved down into the Desert of Maon. ^a]">[a] ² A certain man in Maon, who had property there at Carmel, was very wealthy. He had a thousand goats and three thousand sheep, which he was shearing in Carmel. ³ His name was Nabal and his wife's name was Abigail. She was an intelligent and beautiful woman, but her husband, a Calebite, was surly and mean in his dealings.

⁴ While David was in the desert, he heard that Nabal was shearing sheep. ⁵ So he sent ten young men and said to them, "Go up to Nabal at Carmel and greet him in my name. ⁶ Say to him: 'Long life to you! Good health to you and your household! And good health to all that is yours!

⁷ " 'Now I hear that it is sheep-shearing time. When your shepherds were with us, we did not mistreat them, and the whole time they were at Carmel nothing of theirs was missing. ⁸ Ask your own servants and they will tell you. Therefore be favorable toward my young men, since we come at a festive time. Please give your servants and your son David whatever you can find for them.' "

⁹ When David's men arrived, they gave Nabal this message in David's name. Then they waited.

¹⁰ Nabal answered David's servants, "Who is this David? Who is this son of Jesse? Many servants are breaking away from their masters these days. ¹¹ Why should I take my bread and water, and the meat I have slaughtered for my shearers, and give it to men coming from who knows where?"

¹² David's men turned around and went back. When they arrived, they reported every word. ¹³ David said to his men, "Put on your swords!" So they put on their swords, and David put on his. About four hundred men went up with David, while two hundred stayed with the supplies.

¹⁴ One of the servants told Nabal's wife Abigail: "David sent messengers from the desert to give our master his greetings, but he hurled insults at them. ¹⁵ Yet these men were very good to us. They did not mistreat us, and the whole time we were out in the fields near them nothing was missing. ¹⁶ Night and day they were a wall around us all the time we were herding our sheep near them. ¹⁷ Now think it over and see what you can do, because disaster is hanging over our master and his whole household. He is such a wicked man that no one can talk to him."

¹⁸ Abigail lost no time. She took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five dressed sheep, five seahs ^b]">[b] of roasted grain, a hundred cakes of raisins and two hundred cakes of pressed figs, and loaded them on donkeys. ¹⁹ Then she told her servants, "Go on ahead; I'll follow you." But she did not tell her husband Nabal.

²⁰ As she came riding her donkey into a mountain ravine, there were David and his men descending toward her, and she met them. ²¹ David had just said, "It's been useless—all my watching over this fellow's property in the desert so that nothing of his was missing. He has paid me back evil for good. ²² May God deal with David, ^c]">[c] be it ever so severely, if by morning I leave alive one male of all who belong to him!"

²³ When Abigail saw David, she quickly got off her donkey and bowed down before David with her face to the ground. ²⁴ She fell at his feet and said: "My lord, let the blame be on me alone. Please let your servant speak to you; hear what your servant has to say. ²⁵ May my lord pay no attention to that wicked man Nabal. He is just like his name—his name is Fool, and folly goes with him. But as for me, your servant, I did not see the men my master sent.

²⁶ "Now since the LORD has kept you, my master, from bloodshed and from avenging yourself with your own hands, as surely as the LORD lives and as you live, may your enemies and all who intend to harm my master be like Nabal. ²⁷ And let this gift, which your servant has brought to my master, be given to the men who follow you. ²⁸ Please forgive your servant's offense, for the LORD will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my master, because he fights the LORD's battles. Let no wrongdoing be found in you as long as you live. ²⁹ Even though someone is pursuing you to take your life, the life of my master will be bound securely in the bundle of the living by the LORD your God. But the lives of your enemies he will hurl away as from the pocket of a sling. ³⁰ When the LORD has done for my master every good thing he promised concerning him and has appointed him leader over Israel, ³¹ my master will not have on his conscience the staggering burden of needless bloodshed or of having avenged himself. And when the LORD has brought my master success, remember your servant."

³² David said to Abigail, "Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel, who has sent you today to meet me. ³³ May you be blessed for your good judgment and for keeping me from bloodshed this day and from avenging myself with my own hands. ³⁴ Otherwise, as surely as the LORD, the God of Israel, lives, who has kept me from harming you, if you had not come quickly to meet me, not one male belonging to Nabal would have been left alive by daybreak."

³⁵ Then David accepted from her hand what she had brought him and said, "Go home in peace. I have heard your words and granted your request."

³⁶ When Abigail went to Nabal, he was in the house holding a banquet like that of a king. He was in high spirits and very drunk. So she told him nothing until daybreak. ³⁷ Then in the morning, when Nabal was sober, his wife told him all these things, and his heart failed him and he became like a stone. ³⁸ About ten days later, the LORD struck Nabal and he died.

³⁹ When David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, "Praise be to the LORD, who has upheld my cause against Nabal for treating me with contempt. He has kept his servant from doing wrong and has brought Nabal's wrongdoing down on his own head."
Then David sent word to Abigail, asking her to become his wife. ⁴⁰ His servants went to Carmel and said to Abigail, "David has sent us to you to take you to become his wife."

⁴¹ She bowed down with her face to the ground and said, "Here is your maidservant, ready to serve you and wash the feet of my master's servants." ⁴² Abigail quickly got on a donkey and, attended by her five maids, went with David's messengers and became his wife. ⁴³ David had also married Ahinoam of Jezreel, and they both were his wives. ⁴⁴ But Saul had given his daughter Michal, David's wife, to Paltiel ^d]">[d] son of Laish, who was from Gallim.

Something Nice

Do you remember that old adage, "If you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all?" When did that go out of style? I am sometimes amazed at what people say to others. We have always made every effort to have our children to be kind to one another, and to treat each other with respect in words and actions. Recently, however, my husband and I decided to put practical emphasis in encouraging our children to be kind to one another. So once a week during our family evening worship time we start by first praying, (obviously) but then we go around and say something nice about each member of our family. It does something wonderful for our spirits. I guess that is why Paul in Ephesians 4:29-32 says:

29Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

It has been a great way for us to encourage our children to be Godly. We look for opportunities to praise them and their good actions. All too often we see the negative things they do, (which still require correction) but how often do we forget to encourage and build them up? I can't but notice how well the kids respond to praise. Little Faith, our youngest, picked up the broom and was playing at sweeping. I encouraged her with how much "Mommy likes it when she helps, and how pleased it makes Jesus too!" Now she comes home from kindergarten takes the broom and sweeps the kitchen. The same of our ten year old Anah, she now takes out the trash without being told, because I mentioned how much it meant to me that she did that. Charlie 7, now helps Faith out of the vehicle and walks her to and from class because my husband told him how proud of him he was because he takes such good care of his sisters. What peace a little encouragement has brought to our family. Our homes should be a sanctuary. The world may often be unkind to us, especially for believers in the Lord Jesus Christ; therefore, our homes should radiate with the love of Christ. We aren't perfect, but we are striving to be like the one who is.

I'm A Blogger!

Why has it taken me so long to decide to blog??